Here you can see an example of a high level IELTS Task 2 Essay with an explanation of what makes it a good essay.
Task Question
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Model Answer
Nowadays, employers are becoming more likely to ask for personal information from people applying for jobs [1]. Some people think that the sharing of this information may benefit both the employee and employer in the long run, while others think it is an invasion of privacy [2].
On one hand [3], some people say that sharing personal information with an employer during an interview may be valuable [4]. If employers know about a potential employee’s hobbies, interests and marital status for example [5] they might be better able to know if that person is suitable for the position [6]. Furthermore [7], it is also argued that single people are more productive in their job than married people [8]. A person who has a family might experience a lot of stress and bringing it to the workplace may affect their colleagues [9]. In addition, the knowledge of a candidate’s hobbies or interests could be incredibly useful [10]. For example, an employee with creative hobbies might be encouraged to take on responsibilities requiring creativity in the future [11].
On the other hand, there are also people who say that sharing personal information is private and not useful [12]. They believe sharing this kind of information might be considered an invasion of an employee’s privacy [13], believing that work and home life should be kept separate [14]. Perhaps the way a person behaves in their social life, would not accurately represent the way they will behave at work [15]. Based on this, personal information could be considered irrelevant and so questions regarding private life should not be asked in an interview [16].
To conclude [17], it is clear that there are arguments for and against the concept of sharing private information when applying for a job [18]. I agree with those people who say that employers should ask for personal info because it may be helpful and relevant for a future productive purpose [19].
Answer Notes
[1] Introduces the essay topic with a fact or by paraphrasing the question
[2] Shows the two sides of the essay you will discuss
[3] Shows that we are now talking about one side of the argument
[4] Introduces the first side of the argument
[5] Presents the first point on this side of the discussion
[6] Explains why this is a useful point to make
[7] Linking word tells us there is more to say
[8] Explains the second important point on this side of the discussion
[9] Provides evidence for the argument made
[10] Linking word tells us there is more to say
[11] Explains the second important point on this side of the discussion
[12] Introduces the opposing argument
[13] Explains why the opposing argument is important
[14] Continues to explain why this argument is important
[15] Introduces a new point for the same argument
[16] Explains why this point is relevant to the essay
[17] Introduces the conclusion
[18] Summarises the essay just discussed
[19] Provides the final opinion based on the discussion provided above
